If it crosses my mind?
Yes, more than once. More than it should probably. But I don’t mind. Not any more. Because even though the pain lingered on for a long time, and it occasionally surfaces once in a while, I’ve gotten used to it. I can deal with it. I’m equipped, armored. The battle wounds haven’t quite healed and the scars are left as memories but I accept it. It’s become a habit. Although it may not be the most pleasurable one, I allow the thoughts to stay for a while, to meander across my mind in their own fashionable way. The difference now is that I know when to wave goodbye to them, kindly showing them the exit. And they leave.
So yes, it all crosses my mind now and again but it’s simply a crossing, not a battlefield anymore.