A number

You say I’m just a number
That I’ve got nothing left to lose
Yet try then to explain
Why is it that I feel
Every time you utter my name
I sink, I weaken, I bruise.

A grand fear of eloping
Everything I’ve ever fought for
Misplacing what was right
In order to add up
An equation no longer balanced
I delete, I redo, I ignore.

So it may seem to you
As easy as first grade addition
To continue straight in line
To sink, to weaken, to not listen
I’m bruised
I’m deleted
I can’t be redone
You say I’m just a number
Yet if forced to add up all my pieces
You couldn’t even find the sum.

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