There are few words which role so gently and easily off the tongue. You can almost touch the lightness, delicate, fragile, porcelain word. Imagine the strength, passion and dedication. Dreamful colors and ease. A poise.
Belle Ballerina. You are beautiful in ways indescribable to the ordinary.
I take on the pain of others
Carry their burdens on my shoulders
Let their weights be mine
To protect, to care, to cover
To ease and to release
To always be there
I embody the feelings of others
Share their emotions in my heart
Allow lines to be erased
To still, to aid, to free
To see yet be blind
To always put you first.
The words just keep flowing
My hand can’t stop writing
Endless, ruthless, priceless
Finding a feeling to describe
So hard, painful, empyting
When there’s nothing left inside
But you feel you’re holding back
Just to hide
Put a smile on, get the show on the road
It’ll be my little secret.
I catch a glimpse of the shadow of the past
She’s standing there, facing me
Wondering where I’ve been
Pondering whether to speak
Is it too soon?
I stare back, my eyes reflected in hers
As if to say, you’re not mine anymore
Her eyes flicker, her head cautiously bends
I’ve lost sight.
The only eyes staring back at me are my own.
I confessed everything to him that night. Told him all about myself, opened up. He did not judge, only listened. With an understanding and calm expression on his face, he just listened. But no matter how hard he tried to cover up and suppress his feelings I knew I had hurt him.
“The truth,” he started.
A long pause. The silence was painfully present. I did not dare to speak, afraid I might further break what was already terribly broken.
“It’s painful,” he finally managed to make out.
I looked up at him, eyes filled with remorse. My entire body was shaking inside of anger and sorrow. Regret. I had done it again. This time I had stabbed him so deep that there wasn’t a doctor in the world who could manage to sew his wounds.
“Impossible. Can’t be saved. No need to even try.” Cold yet truthful, words filled with honesty yet no sincerity.
I couldn’t even bring myself to apologize. I couldn’t even make out those simple words that might possibly have helped. Never before had I been so angry at myself. But my choice had been made.
I left him that night. Told myself it was for the best. For him, for me, for us. No more us. Just the dagger and I. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it I knew we would hurt again, it was only a matter of time.
An ode to the future
Or to where we once belonged
When shadows were gracious
And struggles forlorn.
Young, wild and free
No commitment you see
I can do whatever I please
Come and go
And by all means
Not love a single soul
If I do not seize
Cannot sit out
Heart starts to shout
I’m a rebel without a cause
Tie me down, frown
This life ain’t for me.